Over all these years of empowering and releasing church planters, there is one thing that I do hear with some frequency - "if I had known what I know now, I would have been a much better team player..."
I would like to have some fun, with a touch of honesty and a splash of reflection, and share some of the ways in which we can all be better wingmen in this journey of leadership.
The more I study the Trinity, the more collaborative my leadership approach becomes. Of course there is captaincy in any leadership arrangement... It is is the trinity. It is in the home. It is in the church. But there is far too much alpha male thinking in lead pastor models in the modern church. We act as if that is the biggest piece of ecclesiology evidenced in the scriptures. Unfortunately, it is not even in the text - but that is for another conversation.
How do you choose whose team you you will play on?
Simple peep over his shoulder - what do you see?
1. With a new leader, you would not have had time to see him as a seasoned campaigner. Therefore, you can look and see what he was like as a wingman. Did he love, serve, care, sacrifice or was he self preoccupied, promotion driven, only fussed by how he would benefit by the moment [what is in it for me? Danger, danger, danger]
2. If married, how does he treat his wife, publicly and privately? How he treats her is how he will actually and ultimately treat the bride.
3. How does he speak of those who were once his leaders? Is there honor, respect and appreciation? Where there has been human weakness, is it treated with love but honesty in a redemptive way?
4. How has he handled others? Does he treat his team with authentic collaboration and partnership or are they there to fulfill his vision [where on earth is that in the text?] Are their giftings recognized, given air time, applauded or silenced and forgotten? Are staff joked about behind their backs and patronized? Danger, danger, danger. How do they handle staff no longer with them? Are they forgotten, spoke of poorly, disrespected?
These and others are certainly reasons to avoid these kind of leaders. If they have done it to others, they will just as easily do it to you.
More to come....